Chibi might be dead today

Alarm went off at 10 am, looked at my phone to turn it off, had a text saying Chibi couldn’t walk, and was crying. I had enough energy to stay up, but decided it wasn’t worth it, so went back to bed.

When I woke up around 12 pm, I had a missed call from her. Called her back, thought she would of already taken her to the vet, nope they can’t see her till 3 pm. She said she can walk a little, then she falls down. She’s peeing on herself too. Cries when she’s awake.

She wasn’t as bad this morning, she let put her outside, and she walked back in. She had to come home from work, and won’t get paid for today.

Nobody knows what happened, why she got worse. She isn’t eating or drinking either.

You don’t have to like a dog to not want them dead. Maybe she was annoying when she was younger, but that isn’t a good reason to not like her. Not liking her because somebody else doesn’t, isn’t a good reason either.

The problem is, you have to put them down, which feels like murder. It just reminds me of all the dead dogs I know, like Buddy and Meiko, and then that Tonka will be dead someday too. If Tonka doesn’t die in her sleep, then it’ll be just as bad as losing Buddy, if not worse. No dogs I grew up with will be alive anymore.

Dog being smart or not also doesn’t matter, just ask God, all there is is love. Ask the guy that died and came back, not a “near death experience”, nothing near about it, they were dead.

Update
She’s gone. She said she looked peaceful. When they gave her the shot.

Might be sleeping for a long time. Assuming I go to bed earlier. And I fall a sleep.